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Originally uploaded by Rachel Ariel.

The time: Tuesday night
The place: some bar on Colfax
My state of inebriation: Not quite as drunk as I let myself feel.

So there I was, out with two people I barely know. Strangely, one of them I have known for over ten years, and yet... I barely know him. I think I may have scared him some, when I off handedly mentioned the clothes that he used to wear in middle school. I suppose that if someone I hadn't seen in five years turned to me and listed the clothes that I wore ten years ago I too might have been slightly... curious (if not downright alarmed).

It got me thinking about the ways we remember things. I remember his clothes, in a general sort of way (X Files tee shirt and a green trench coat, not anything more or less than that). I remember that that was the time my friend Rico wore a lot of tie-dyed Star Wars themed tee shirts. I remember that there was a stoner girl on my bus who had a pair of corduroy pants she always wore, to the point that the cords were actually worn down in the knee. I remember there was a kid I would always see on my way to wood shop who had a Marilyn Manson shirt he would always wear.

Strangely... I don't really remember what I was wearing at that point. I assume it was my fairly standard jeans and over-sized teeshirt. It was before I knew really anything about music, so i couldn't tell you what the tee shirts were (since they wouldn't have been concert/ band shirts yet). I remember that some kid who sat next to me in the gym line said something along the lines of "so you finally got *real* shoes" when I bought a pair of suede low top converse soccer style shoes. for all i know those may actually be in my closet at my moms.

i guess what i wonder is... why do we remember what we remember? why do certain people stick out in my mind more than others? This person I was at the bar with the other night... He and I were never really friends at all... I don't know if we're actually friends yet. He mentions people, and I know the names. I know we were more than acquaintances in high school. But I haven't given these people more than a passing thought in the last five years. Except for the ones I have. The ones I was never quite brave enough to try and talk to in high school. The ones I admired from afar... for whatever reason. Their art, their intelligence, their ability to captivate my friends, their courage, their beauty.

I don't know if I was ever quiet. But I'm curious... if anybody googles my name and wonders what I'm doing now.